Stories

I’ve Got To Break Free

It’s a sunny yet rainy Sunday here in Rotterdam. The weather has been like this for a couple of days now. I hear ”I’ve Got To Break Free” by Queen on the radio, while lighting my cigarette and feel like it’s the perfect time to reflect on how far I’ve come.

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I’m not writing this to show off, instead, I hope that by sharing a personal and true story I’m able to inspire you, the reader, on an even deeper level. I want to encourage you to do the same things, to make the best out of your life. Because if I can do it, you can do too.

A lot has changed in the past year since I created Good Vibes Boulevard and started blogging.  As ”normal” as it seems to me right now to just grab my laptop and start writing some inspirational stuff, I have to be honest and say that it wasn’t that easy for me back then. There was always something holding me back – The fear of people not liking or understanding what I had to tell. Until I finally decided to just fucking do it, only get such positive responses in return. I realized that it was all in my head. It was the moment where I promised myself to never hold back in the name of fear.

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my dramatic ass dropping out

I struggled a lot with finding internal freedom. To just do what you feel is right. I think this is a common problem in today’s society. I remember dropping out of college in 2017. I had such a hard time finding an education that suited me. I made the bold move to quit as soon as I knew that I had to walk a different path.

That’s a hard thing to do when you see every one around you who you went to school with: graduating, getting married, becoming a parent and everything in between.

I know I’ve always been an outsider, a free spirit, who did whatever she thought was right for herself, yet here I was doubting myself because I was actually going against the mainstream, trying to find myself. I felt like I was failing in life.

I realized that it was all in my head. It was the moment where I promised myself to never hold back in the name of fear.

Not a day went by that I wasn’t thinking about my future and if it was the right decision to make. I had this mentality that I was getting ”older” and that time was running out to figure my life out.

Weird right? I believe this issue is mostly created by society’s standards. I mean, let’s face it. What good are you when you don’t have a bachelor’s degree or if you’re not already living on your own at 21? The standards are way too high, which gives us a pretty unrealistic view and expectation on life.

It took some time, but I finally understood that, that’s just not how life works. We are all able to make our own choices and we all have the right to decide what direction we want our lives to take. That doesn’t make us stupid, it’s a way of self-care, truly listening to yourself, your mind, heart and spirit.

We are all able to make our own choices and we all have the right to decide what direction we want our lives to take.

 

I knew I had to create a new mindset in order to truly break free from what society was telling me on how I should live my life.

That’s when I decided to STOP listening to my fears and opinions of others, and to START listening to my heart and basically do whatever the fuck I thought was the right thing to do. That’s when I went to wordpress.com and created this page.

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Fast forward to May 5th 2019. I work a fulltime job at a really amazing company (yes you can still find a decent job even without a degree). I’m learning new things every single day, wether it’s work or social life related. I’m taking Language courses and spend a lot of time working on side projects such as photography and traveling, just to name a few.

Never would I have ever thought a year ago that my life would be like this. But the moment I changed my mindset, was the moment everything changed. Because I didn’t have a degree, I was aware that I basically start from the bottom, but that was all fine by me. I started working as a service employee at a local cinema. Of course I knew I had more instore for myself, but I took the time to grow in spirit and life. I did not rush myself and if I had to give someone from my age (22) or any other age for that matter, one piece of advice it would be to stop rushing!

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Stop stressing. It’s not worth it.

You’re never ”too old” and time is never ”running out”. Fuck yesterday, focus on today and keep having faith in a better tomorrow. Sounds cliché I know, but it works.

I did what I had to do which was finding a job to earn money. Besides that I kept paying attention to my blog, because that is my true passion, writing. In the meantime I focussed on growth. GROWTH was, is and for ever will be the key word in my life. It is what keeps me going and motivated.

Thanks to sticking to that mindset I now have a way better job, a way better income, an audience of 80k+ who follows my blog and the possibilities to do whatever I want to do.

Now, I’m not a billionaire so I can’t literally do anything I want, but that’s not what I mean. I’m rich in life. I’m blessed, fearless and growing. I’m embracing life and understanding the importance of self-expression, self-care and self-love.

I’m still finding my way, and I don’t think I’ll ever stop looking, because with a wider perspective comes new opportunities and more exciting things to discover.

I don’t know what the future has instore for me. All I know is that if I’m going to look back again, I want to say: ”Damn, that was a fun ride. I’m glad I did that.” Instead of: ”If only I took the chances when I could..

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